My Expectations of Other People during MY Pregnancy.

 This is a "I gave you fair-warning" blog post. Pay attention.


I know each and every person has a different pregnancy than everyone else, AND that each pregnancy is different, even within the same woman.  I know there are people out there who act one way towards pregnant women, while others act the complete opposite.  I have found a "letter" directed at non-pregnant people and how they act towards pregnant women.  I shall now give my own interpretation of the points made in the previously mentioned letter.

1) Appropriate enthusiasm when hearing about someone's pregnancy is greatly appreciated and is really the only proper response.  If you aren't happy to hear about it, don't say anything. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." Everyone I've told about my pregnancy has done a swimmingly well with this point, so kudos to all of you wonderful people!

2) I know you have your own kids and things worked out a certain way for you, but that may not be what I want or what even remotely happens for me.  In short, I will probably appreciate your advice and opinions, HOWEVER please ask me before shoving them in my face.  I do not want to be irritated at the people I like, just because they think they know better than me.  (Exception to this point: my mother, because she is my mother, and Linda, because she is Kenny's mother and has never been "in your face" with advice to me, or rude.)  This right here is exactly why we aren't telling people the names we've picked out until after the baby is born.  For now, let's just say (as Hayden said yesterday at the reunion) if it's a boy it's "Digicom" (or something like that, it was loud in the room), and if it's a girl it's "Pikachu".

3) Please don't tell or ask me about gained weight unless I bring it up first.  This includes anything about "must be twins", "about to pop", anything with the word "swollen" in it, and even if you think I haven't gained enough weight.  I understand that people gain different amounts and that doctors recommend different things for each of the different patients.  But in general, you wouldn't ask a "normal" person about their weight, so don't do it to me.  I will ask the same back to you and act confused if you think it's weird.

4) DO NOT TOUCH ME! IF YOU TOUCH ME, I WILL TOUCH YOU BACK IN THE SAME MANNER! ESPECIALLY IN PUBLIC.  YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I don't care if it's instinct for you. It shouldn't be. When you touch my belly, you are NOT touching the baby, you are touching me.  The baby is inside me. You cannot touch the baby until he/she is born.
Side note: Questions about how I plan to give birth, whether I plan to breastfeed, how I plan to diaper, etc. are all acceptable questions, as long as you accept that it is what I am going to do and do NOT try to tell me I'm wrong or change my mind.  I understand things may not have worked for you, but that doesn't necessarily mean it won't for me.  Accept it or shut up.

5) You are not invited to the birth.  You may visit me in the hospital afterwards.

6) You may not invite yourself to my house afterwards.  If you do, you will not be let in.  You may call me and ask to visit, and I may decline or accept the offer.  You may offer to bring me food, and I might accept, but that does NOT mean you may stay for a while.  If I need you, I will ask.  If you ask to stay longer, I may decline or accept your request.  Remember, this is MY child and I will want alone time with him/her and Kenny. 

These are my current rules. I reserve the right to add or remove any rules I choose.  Perhaps in a future post, I will make a list of all that Kenny and I plan to do or not do with our baby.